In regard to fish who might possibly be terrorists and/or mutant aliens:

  There have been several comments that have arisen about my fish. In my defense, I am not an animal abuser. I do not beat my fish maliciously, or force him to eat plastic rocks, or any of those other atrocious crimes. Still though, he dislikes me immensely. You can just see that little gleam in his eye. It says "when you sleep tonight, I am going to hop out of here, flop wickedly across the floor to your bed, and gnaw your toe off, causing you to die of blood loss.". See illustration:

  

(pulling the "I'M JUST A CUTE FISHY, I WON'T EAT YOU" card when most people glance at him)

Then after the people leave, this is what I see:

 

(niiicceee fishy... Eaasssyyy fishy...)

  He grows a Mohawk, gets multiple piercings, and has that freaky "I EET U" tattoo on his tailfin. He's a regular mafia fish with his own collection of AK47s. I'm lucky every night to survive!

 

(night murderer plans)

  See? Horrible behavior, I tell you! Is it possible to turn your fish in for attempted man (or woman) slaughter? What about possible ties to Al Qaeda? Look at the plans I found him trying to hide under the aquarium rocks the other day:

  

(no respect from that fish at all!)

  See? I think my terrorist fish theories may be justified! It won't be long before he blows us all up with his alleged "fish-flake bomb", then escapes, flopping, to the nearest terrorist training site. 

  

(see what I have to put up with?)

   I wonder if there is a rehab for terrorist fish? Could be something worth looking into. 

   So yes, see now, children? This is my evil fish. Haven't the foggiest what kind of fish he is, beyond malicious. His name is Voldemort, by the way.